3 February 2012                                                              

Prot. No. 093/1/12

Dear Friends:

There can no longer be any doubt that religious liberty in our country is in jeopardy. On January 20, 2012, the United States Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) with the approval of President Obama issued a new federal mandate making coverage of all abortive drugs, sterilization, and FDA-approved contraceptives obligatory for virtually all employees, including those working in faith-based institutions. 

The new mandate is the first federal regulation in our nation’s history to require all religious institutions to pay for this coverage. Now nearly all those who provide insurance must comply. To force Catholics to provide these mandated services violates both our faith conviction and our freedom.

 In upholding this regulation, the Administration has ignored the First Amendment to the Constitution of the United States and has denied Catholics the most fundamental freedom, religious liberty.  Despite the Church’s appeal for a broader religious exemption, which was echoed by many other faiths, the Administration refused to modify the regulation’s current exemption that is limited to religious groups that hire and serve people primarily of their own faith.  Most churches and church-run institutions do not qualify for the exemption because of our very openness to serving the common good of society and all people regardless of creed in hospitals, universities, social service agencies, etc.

Catholics of all backgrounds across America are already fighting this mandate.  The HHS rules are unjust and unreasonable.  There is no need for this in a land of freedom! Leaders of major Catholic organizations, such as the Catholic Health Association, Catholic Relief Services, Catholic Charities USA, as well as Catholic Universities and Schools, and people like you and I, as Catholics and as Americans who love this great country, must continue to speak out against this new, unprecedented mandate.

This is the time to speak up, for our voices to be heard.  Likewise, we need to commit ourselves to prayer so that wisdom and justice may prevail, for without God, we can do nothing, and with God, nothing is impossible.

Prayer and speaking out should be combined with thoughtful and harmonious action. Please visit www.usccb.org/conscience to learn more about this blow to religious liberty and how we can find the right resources to support legislation that would reverse the effects of the Administration’s decision. 

 With gratitude for your collaboration in this very important matter and with every good wish, I am

Yours in Christ,

+Gregory John Mansour

The closest I ever got was an ultrasound.But a father or a mother who have experienced the birth of their long awaited son or daughter, with much pain yet much joy, know what is real, know the importance of each life. They can answer this question better than I :

Why did God become a little child ?

Two philosophers – both believers – were discussing the awesome power of God. The first said ” God is all powerful. He can do anything.” The second said, “Really ? Can he become a little child ?” The first thought a long while and finally said “Why would he want to do such a thing ?”

Only a mother or a father can answer that.

Mothers and Fathers, what do you feel when a child is born ?

Some have told me they feel a complete willingness to do whatever they can to love, protect, and raise this child who came from them, and for whom they are completely responsible.

Others have told me that they stand in awe and real fear, hoping they will be able to do all that is good for this child. They question every move and depend completely on any inspiration and help they can get in guiding their care and love for this helpless child entrusted in their care.

Others have told me that they simply stand in awe and wonder at such a great a beautiful gift that has been given to them. They feel they are now part of something (or should we say, someone !) much bigger than themselves. This gift draws them out of themselves and inspires in them a strength, a desire to sacrifice, and a capacity to love that they never thought they possessed.

Dear friends, why did God, the all powerful Creator of the universe, become a little child, allow himself to be laid in a manger, with no room at the inn, poor and neglected? Why was he pleased to be loved by shepherds and wise men who sought him out, and by Mary and Joseph, who lived each day with wonder and respect at such a great and imponderable plan?

Does the Master of the Universe desire something from us? Does he want to draw something out of us, to make us part of something (Someone!) greater than ourselves? Does he want us, like Mary and Joseph, to stand in awe and wonder, and yes some fear and trembling, before such a great Mystery? Does He want us to know that pain and joy in childbirth are part of His own Mystery as well as ours?

From the Holy Bible we know that God does not visit us as a mighty warrior, a powerful king or as righteous judge, but rather as a child who needs us, who is helpless, vulnerable and poor.

Why would God “do such a thing”? Why should He? Does He desire our love and want to love us in return, not from on high, but from among us? Can He actually love us for our own sake, not His own, for our own good, not His own? Why would He love us even at His own expense?

Mothers and fathers, can you answer this? If you can, this alone can explain the Manger. This alone can explain the Cross.

Our Faith teaches that the God of the universe not only became a child, but he did so in the little town of Bethlehem, whose name, in Aramaic, means the “House of Bread” (Beit Lahem). It was thus not enough that He became a child, He also became bread for those who need him. He became small so as not to scare us. He became poor so as to enrich us. He became vulnerable so that we might turn to Him in our time of need. He longed to feed us as our parents feed us for our own good! This is the God who became Eucharistic Bread at Bethlehem!

Philosophers and parents, you and I, and all people of good will can this night stand in awe and wonder, love and longing, fear and hope before the God who becomes a child this day, Christmas Day; the God who becomes our daily bread at Bethlehem.

This child in His mother’s arms is the God who becomes for us Emmanuel, God with us.

Merry Christmas

I love to listen to Christmas carols. Being a romantic at heart, I am always amazed at the beauty of the Christmas story. In such carols as What Child is This, Mary did you Know?, Silent Night, and O Little Town of Bethlehem, to mention a few, one cannot imagine a story more beautiful. God became a child to save us! In fact, He became a child who needs us, who is vulnerable, who depends on us, and who is, as we believe, “like us in all things but sin”!

The child, once conceived, lives within the womb of the mother, just below her heart! The father stands guard, protects and supports them. The child is born – in pain, yet with much wonder – reared and educated by the ones who brought him or her into this world. God willing, one day that father will walk her down the aisle, or the mother will watch her son become a priest, or the two of them will see their child with children of their own. This is all part of God’s loving plan and it is most wonderful to behold. Yet it requires us to be at our best. But we must be honest, the vocation and dignity of marriage, or the protection of life in the womb, or our parenting abilities do not always find us at our best. May God help, forgive, guide, sustain and show us his way.

And now, back to the Christmas story about how God himself came into our world. In this story, there is also marriage, childbirth and much love, yet there is also something wonderfully new. Although Mary and Joseph came into this world in the usual way, Mary was conceived without original sin in order to give her complete freedom to make her “yes” at the Annunciation (Lk 1). This story, which we call the Immaculate Conception (of Mary in the womb of her mother, Anna) is God’s new beginning with us. Mary, through her loving obedience, is the new Eve who becomes the “mother of all the living” (Gn 2) and Jesus the new Adam. Together they show us what it means to live in complete fidelity to God and invite us to be as Saint Paul urges, “a new creation” (2Cor 5:17).

In the Christmas story, Jesus was conceived in the womb of Mary by the announcement of the Angel Gabriel and the overshadowing of the Holy Spirit. Mary made her complete and free gift of self when she said “May it be done to me according to your Word.” (Lk 1:38) Joseph, by the revelation of an angel, decided that instead of “divorcing her quietly” (Mt 1:19), as was his plan, he would take “her into his home,” (Mt 1:24) and care for her as a “virgin who cared for the Virgin”(Maronite Liturgy). This celibate and chaste caring was something completely new and wonderful, a sign that God was doing something new in the midst of his people. The Church from the beginning has honored this truth with tenderness and respect. It may not make complete sense to the world, but still the story continues to inspire hope and gratitude even today. This is the Christmas message and it does not get better than that!

The way we come into the world and the way you did, O Lord, is a wonder! Help us, Lord, to honor both this Christmas season.

+Gregory John Mansour

The Maronite Chapel at the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception in Washington, D.C.

In the Fall of 2007, I had gathered a team of seventeen persons from throughout the Eparchy of Saint Maron to see if we could make a joint effort to financially set the Eparchy on a solid foundation for the future. First, this Committee insisted on complete financial transparency and accountability, a process that I had already begun in the Chancery Office and which was very well underway in each of the parishes. We are now happy to say that we are as transparent and accountable as any diocese can and should be.

The Committee felt the great need to focus on fundraising in the Eparchy because we had no endowment for the Seminary, no support fund for our missions, the Cathedral had need of major repairs, and the Priest Retirement Fund was much under-funded. I thought we would focus on these four needs – all noble, and all very much needed. They were all “maintenance” issues that needed to be done. At that time, the Eparchy was infusing an extra $100,000 each year to support a meager $900 a month stipend for retired priests. The Seminary had no extra monies to do needed repairs or to support the new vocations God was sending us. The Cathedral needed basic repairs just to stop leaks, maintain its walls and towers, and to avoid continued deterioration, and our missions had nothing extra to go on to continue to thrive.

All seventeen members of the team wanted us not just to maintain but to dream. They asked “what dream do you have that can rally our people and help them not only to financially maintain the heritage they have been given, but to go beyond?” At that time I brought up the idea of the Chapel at the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception. They unanimously wanted us to include it along with the other four needed “maintenance” projects. Thus, the Chapel, a dream that was shelved, became a dream of hope.

Chorbishop Michael Thomas began discussions with Monsignor Walter Rossi, Rector of the National Shrine. I began discussions with Cardinal Justin Rigali, Chairman of the Shrine Board of Trustees. The cost for the Chapel was then estimated at less than the million previously thought. Artistic and architectural plans were drawn up. In the meantime, I had gone out to a handful of donors and asked for help with all five of our goals, four to maintain and one to dream. With God’s grace I was able to secure pledges totaling $1.85 million to be given over a period of five years from a few of those donors. This was a good beginning, but shortly after that, the economy turned bad and several of those whom I had hoped could help with pledges asked me to wait until times got better. Thus, I put our fundraising efforts on hold, and instead moved in a new direction, to get more people in the Eparchy involved in helping.

We brought on board Mr. John Kurey as Eparchial Stewardship Director. He was able to help us with Eparchial Benefit Dinners in Washington and New York, and he successfully applied for several grants for the Eparchy including for seminarian education, the Cathedral, the Servants of Christ the Light, and our missions. He has been a great help to us in reaching out. All of the costs of the Stewardship Office for the first years, including his salary, are covered by grants he has written. We are now on solid foundation to meet more of our financial commitments.

Through all these efforts, we were able to afford the Chapel, which cost a total of $525,000. We have also begun our renovations at the Cathedral, which is a big project, and will take a lot more help. We have raised the pension for our retired priests from $900 to $1,500 per month, which is still too little, so we continue to work on it. We have made several needed repairs to the Seminary and have continued to support our fine seminarians. One day we hope to establish a revolving loan fund to provide financial support for the missions and parishes.

We are nowhere near our goal for all four of the maintenance projects which we set out to accomplish, but we are on our way. While on the way, we have been blessed with a beautiful new Maronite Chapel that reminds us of our stone churches in Lebanon and the art and spirituality of our ancient Maronite tradition.

We are closer than we were five years ago when we set out not only to maintain but to dream, but we still need your help. To find out more about how you can help, please contact us at (718)-237-9913 or saintmaron@yahoo.com, or visit the Eparchy’s web site at www.stmaron.org.

 + Bishop Gregory Mansour

I hope and pray that the Maronite Church throughout the world, as well as every citizen and friend of Lebanon will come to respect and love the wisdom of our Patriarch, and embrace his vision of a Maronite Church and a Lebanon in dialogue with others.

Please join me in welcoming His Beatitude, Bechara Peter Rai, Maronite Patriarch of Antioch and All the East.

                                                                                                                          September 30, 2011

Dear Mr. President:

I am terribly disappointed with the rebuff of Patriarch Bechara Peter Rai who is the Catholic leader of the Maronites worldwide and one of the most respected Christian leaders in Lebanon and the Middle East.  The motto of his coat of arms reflects his personality and is call for “communion and love.” He has been trying to achieve what no other Middle Eastern political or a religious leader has been able to do:  meet others with respect and love, not take sides, and build bridges to a future that will hopefully lead to peace and happiness for all people in the Middle East.

Muslim and Christian groups have all found in him a real father, a Patriarch.  Because he has spoken out expressing his concern for the future of Christians in the Middle East, he has been rebuffed by you and your Administration.  It is pure hypocrisy for the leader of the free world to refuse to meet with Patriarch Rai especially since the Prime Minister of Israel can come and completely disregard essential parts of a peace plan and still be given a warm welcome, and the King of Saudi Arabia, where Christians have no freedom whatsoever, can be received with highest honors. Mr. President, you are ignoring the plight of Christians in the Middle East!

Patriarch Rai’s warning about the future of Christians in Syria is not taboo. Christians are in a state of peril in the same way that Christians of Iraq were a few years ago when two thirds of them migrated out of the country and are still not protected to this day. To say the Patriarch supports dictators and sides with terrorists is pure nonsense.  With his own unique charisma, Patriarch Rai has reached out to all Lebanese with whom he has to live side-by-side. It is a beautiful outreach, one that is uniquely his, without having to be beholden to anyone.  He speaks with love and tempers the divisive, hateful talk of many. He gives hope

A new day is dawning in the Middle East.  The Arab Spring is happening with little vision for the summer that will ensue.  Mr. President, you do not have to agree on everything with Patriarch Rai, but there is no need to avoid or rebuff him.  By doing so, you are showing your disrespect for him and for all Christians of the Middle East.

 + Gregory J Mansour

Bishop of the Eparchy of Saint Maron of Brooklyn

Dear Brothers and Sisters in Christ,

A Cardinal, three Maronite bishops, more than forty priests, twenty deacons and subdeacons and their spouses, several members of the Order of Saint Sharbel and the National Apostolate of Maronites, members of the Maronite History Committee, choir and parishioners of Our Lady of Lebanon in Washington, our five seminarians, as well as several friends and dignataries, gathered in Washington, D.C., September 23, 2011, to celebrate the dedication of the Maronite Chapel at the Basilica of the National Shrine of the Immaculate Conception. Later that evening, another wonderful event took place celebrating the 50^th anniversary of priesthood for Chorbishop Seely Beggiani and the 50^th anniversary of our Maronite Seminary. The weekend also served as the annual gathering for the Order of Saint Sharbel and retreat for our deacons and subdeacons. These were grace-filled days filled with much gratitude and love.

In 1961, when the Seminary was opened, there were forty-five Maronite parishes in the United States, all under the jurisdiction of their local Latin bishops. We were only beginning in the United States to think of ourselves as one body in Christ. After many years of trying to raise funds and gather our parishes together, our efforts were starting to bear fruit. The Seminary was a joint effort of clergy and laity together. Priests would travel from city to city, sometimes by bus, to raise funds. Laity were working alongside the priests making this a real grass roots effort which was borne in the hearts of clergy and faithful alike who loved their Church.

In 1961, Patriarch Paul Peter Meouchi came to dedicate the Seminary. Two years later, at the first convention of the National Association (later Apostolate) of Maronites, the first graduate of the Seminary, our own Bishop Robert Shaheen, was ordained in the National Basilica, just a few steps away from the new Maronite Chapel! Two years later in 1966, Bishop Francis M. Zayek was assigned by the Holy Father to be our first bishop. The rest is history.

+ Bishop Gregory Mansour

Eparchy of Saint Maron of Brooklyn

When Someone Close to you Lies anc Cheats

One of the most difficult realities to manage is the discovery that someone close to you has lied and cheated. Jesus tells to Peter to forgive “70 times 7 times.” (Matthew 18:22) Unfortunately this sounds to some like we should be a “doormat” for those who offend us. However, true forgiveness is not to be confused with enabling a person to lie, cheat or abuse. That is not what Jesus intended.

In the Gospel Jesus says that if someone “strikes you on the right cheek, turn and offer him the left”. (Matthew 5:39) He also says if someone forces you to walk “one mile, go with him an extra mile,” (Matthew 5:41) and if someone “sues for your coat, offer him your shirt as well.” (Matthew 5:40)

These famous sayings of Jesus are sometimes interpreted, quite wrongly, as meaning that we must be quiet in front of evil and accept a person’s abuse. The direct opposite is true. Jesus advocates a strong loving defiance towards those who abuse. He says, if I may paraphrase: “do not hit me with the back of your hand as if I am inferior to you; I am a man like you; do not belittle me, hit me like an equal, this will remind you that you and I both deserve dignity and respect.”

Likewise, Jesus says that if a Roman soldier, according to the law of that day, can impose on someone the task to carry his bag for one mile, you should go two miles just to let him know that you are a slave to no one, and that you are free, even if a Roman soldier thinks he has power over you. And lastly, Jesus advises that if someone wants to humiliate you by taking your coat in a law suit, freely offer him your shirt as well, for there may be no other way to shame someone who shamelessly takes your coat.

These three directives from Jesus have nothing to do with being a “doormat.” The same is true of forgiving 70 times 7 times. It takes a strong person to forgive and to also stand for what is true. Forgiveness also means strong loving defiance. It does not mean that we passively and reluctantly “turn the other cheek” and pretend the abuse did not happen.

Anyone who lies, cheats or abuses deserves the respectful rebuke of one, who in the name of Jesus, says that this is wrong. It is as if we are saying: “I won’t stand for it, it offends my dignity and yours; I pray that God will not hold this against you, and nor will I; nonetheless, I will not sit back and idly accept bad behavior – no matter what is the cost to myself.” It also says “I will do no harm to you, nor do I wish that anyone else would do you harm, rather, because I love and respect myself, I also expect you to respect yourself; we are both sinners, yet we are also both children of a merciful God.”

Is this being a doormat or is it vindictive? On the contrary, it is neither. It is self respecting, loving and forgiving for the good of myself and others. This is how we should deal with one close to us who lies and cheats, and this is how we should also hope that we too will likewise be treated if/when, in our turn, we also lie, cheat and abuse.

+ Gregory John Mansour

The Visit of Bishop Samir Nassar of Damascus, Syria

For two weeks in July the Maronites in the United States had the joy of hosting Maronite Bishop Samir Nassar of Damascus, Syria, a friendly and caring pastor.  It was a graced time when he learned of the devotion and vibrant faith of Maronites here and we learned of the beautiful witness of the Christians of Damascus, Syria.

The Bishop spoke of his first hand experience assisting the youth and families of our Church in Damascus and their outreach to the many refugees, Christian and Muslim, coming from Iraq.  He also gave us a renewed appreciation for the Massabki Brothers – three Maronite laymen who were killed for their faith in 1860 Damascus.  In the United States we have honored their memory for decades, beginning with those Syrian and Lebanese immigrants who came to this country at the turn of the last century and formed our first parishes here. From the beginning of their days in the United States they were strengthened by a special devotion to these three martyred brothers.  In fact, our Cathedral in New York has always had a special wall painting of the Massabki brothers. The late Archbishop Francis M. Zayek encouraged the National Apostolate of Maronites (NAM) to cherish their witness to Christ from the beginning of his service as bishop in 1966 until his passing in 2010.

Bishop Samir had the opportunity to visit our Clergy Conference and NAM Convention in Philadelphia as well as our parishes in Chicago, St. Louis, Waterbury and Brooklyn. A highlight of his stay was a visit with Bishop Nicholas DiMarzio of Brooklyn whose work with worldwide migrants and refugees has been well known in the United States as well as the Holy See. I could see that the two churchmen made a good impression on each other, which promised a bright future of fraternal cooperation.

Bishop Samir was impressed with the work done here in the United States. In particular, he noted the first and only thoroughly Maronite, and completely Catholic, Faith of the Mountain Catechism Series for first through eighth grade youth.  He also loved the new English Maronite hymns which translated accurately the ancient Syriac poetry and theology.  Lastly, he was pleased to see such good order and harmony among the clergy, religious and laity of both eparchies.

Bishop Samir left for Lebanon and then Syria on July 20, 2011, the Feast of Saint Elias.  I could only pray that the zealous prophet of the Old Testament, as well as Our Lady of Lebanon, will protect Bishop Samir and help him and all the good people of Syria in the difficult days ahead. May the good shepherd of Damascus be strengthened to continue his witness to Christ and his love for his people.

Marriage or Friendship?

No one should be against true friendship, whether friends are of the same sex or opposite sexes.  Friendships are good, and they can be very deep and fulfilling.  The ideal of friendship as a union of hearts and minds in which each one loves the other’s good as his or her own is beautifully exemplified in the friendship of David and Jonathan: “The soul of Jonathan was knit to the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul” (1 Samuel 18:1).  Likewise, friendship was hardly absent from the life of our Lord.  Jesus taught the value of ultimate sacrifice in terms of friendship (John 15:13); he wept over the death of his dear friend Lazarus (John 11:35); revealed his inner most self  to his Apostles in order to transform them from servants into friends (John 15:15); brought Peter, James, and John closer to him than the others (Mt 17,1; Mk 9,2 Mark 5:35-43); and was closest of all to the ‘Beloved Disciple’, who reclined on his chest at the last supper (John 13:23).

Friendship, however, must not be confused with marriage.  While friendships are unions of hearts and minds, marriage by its nature unites hearts, minds, and bodies.  While friendships come in different degrees and kinds of commitment, marriage calls for a permanent and exclusive commitment as well as sexual complementarity. While friendships can be shaped by a variety of pursuits, marriage is naturally fulfilled by, and provides the best possible context for the conception, care, and upbringing of children.

This is by no means to deny that spouses should be friends.  But marriage is more than an especially deep friendship.  Marriage, unlike ordinary friendship, is a comprehensive union oriented to procreation.  Its unique commitment is sealed, embodied, and renewed by conjugal acts—acts of the sort that are in themselves apt for procreation, though, of course, procreation does not always result from them. Where children do come, the loving marital bond of husband and wife offers them the distinctive parental contributions, including the gender role modeling, of both a mother and a father, putting the child’s needs first.  The possibility of truly conjugal acts, and thus the possibility of marriage itself, depends on the reproductive complementarity of the sexes.

Marriage, as the Church so beautifully teaches us, has both procreative and unitive significance, and these two dimensions of the overall marital good are connected in a profound way.  Marriage obviously serves the noble end of handing on the gift of life.  At the same time, marriage, including its sexual dimension, is an end in itself; it fulfills spouses even when they cannot conceive a child.  Just as it is wrong to think of marriage in its sexual dimension as a mere recreational activity that can be detached from its procreative meaning, it is an error to suppose that marital relations are valuable only as a means to conceiving and rearing children.  Conjugal acts in their openness to new life  are honorable and meaningful in themselves because they truly unite husband and wife as “one flesh”—as Jesus, recalling Genesis, teaches us (Genesis 2:24; Mark 10:8; Matthew 19:5).  When the gift of a child comes of the spouses’ “one flesh” union, it is certainly a cause for great joy.  Even where a child is not conceived, however, this union expresses and embodies the marriage as something valuable for its own sake.

The debate about same-sex “marriage” often refers to a “right to marriage” and an opposition to this “right.”  The absence of sexual complementarity makes the marriage of two people of the same sex impossible: they cannot realize the procreative sort of union—including the bodily union—distinctive of marriage.  Something that is impossible cannot be “denied” to anyone; nor can anyone have a “right” to it.  Moreover, no one has a right to have the law or the institutions of the state call something other than what it is.  Truth itself demands that we recognize as marriages only those unions that truly are marriages.  Two persons of the same sex can have a deep friendship; they can support and care for each other very much, but that relationship (whether chaste, as it should be, or unchaste) must be called and treated as what, in truth, it is: a deep friendship, not a marriage. 

If two friends, two relatives or any two persons want to have the state recognize their relationship of mutual care and support for purposes of benefits, medical visits or inheritance, the state may grant that request by legal contract as long as it does not obscure the truth and purpose of marriage.   In other words, as long as the state does not treat non-marital partners as if they were married – for example, by making the existence (or presumption) of a sexual relationship a condition of receiving benefits – it can legitimately honor contracts that facilitate people’s capacities to care for and support each other.

However, marriage is different and has something truly and profoundly valuable to offer society.  It is the foundation of the family:  the original and best “department of health, education, and welfare.”   Nothing is better than the healthy, marriage-based family as the place in which children are loved, cared for, and taught to be productive, creative, upright, and responsible.  By recognizing true marriage and supporting it, both law and culture help to ensure that as many children as possible know and are known by, and love and are loved by, the mother and father through whose marital embrace, by the grace of God, they were brought into being, and in whose permanent marital love their greatest security is to be found.

Certainly, unfortunate things happen, and this is also true of problems in marriage.  No one can guarantee that every child will have the great benefit of being nurtured and educated by his or her biological parents in their loving matrimonial bond.  That is why, thank God, we have possibilities to help those children for whom what is ideal is not possible.  Adoption and foster-parenting are great gifts.  They are to be supported and encouraged. May God bless every adoptive and foster parent who provides parental love and support to a child who is in need.  They are heroes.

Still, it is our obligation, each one of us, to do all that we can to make the ideal situation available for as many children as possible.  And that is why not only our state and national governments, but each of us individually, is under a solemn obligation to support the institution of marriage—true marriage—and to stand against any effort to redefine or undermine it.  As individuals, we can support marriage through our daily actions by being faithful spouses or upright single people, and by supporting the marriages of our family members and friends. The Manhattan Declaration states:

“To strengthen families, we must stop glamorizing promiscuity and infidelity and restore among our people a sense of the profound beauty, mystery, and holiness of faithful marital love. We must work to change ill-advised policies that contribute to the weakening of the institution of marriage, including the discredited idea of unilateral divorce. We must work in the legal, cultural, and religious domains to instill in young people a sound understanding of what marriage is, what it requires, and why it is worth the commitment and sacrifices that faithful spouses make.”

We need not, and we must not, redefine marriage and reduce it to a form of sexualized romantic friendship.  Yet we need not prevent same-sex friends—whether they are chaste, as true love between them demands, or involved with each other in a sexual way—from caring for each other, arranging their finances together, and/or seeing to their practical needs.  However, marriage must always have special recognition, rights, and responsibilities that are distinct from friendships of any type.  Otherwise, the blurring of friendship and true marriage will lead to an erosion of marital norms in the public mind and, soon enough, a weakening of these norms in practice.  Marriage must be recognized by the formal institutions of law as a special form of human communion that unites one man to one woman faithfully in a profoundly personally meaningful and socially indispensable bond.

 Let us then say Yes to marriage; and let us say Yes to friendship; and let us say No to confusing friendship with marriage.

+ Bishop Gregory J. Mansour and Dr. Robert P. George